Can you even believe it?! One week. Seven days. In that amount of time, God willing, we will be sleeping right now in Hong Kong. It is 11:00 Wednesday night there. A week from now, we will have been in-country for about 5 hours, hopefully safely ensconsed in our hotel.
Everybody says this, and they say it because it's true: throughout this process you wait, wait, wait....and wait some more; then everything starts to move at warp speed. A week. How can we be that close? It's not like we haven't had time to prepare. Lord knows we have! Almost a year, actually. Then why do I feel so woefully UNprepared right now? I don't mean logistically or "physically." (Let's be honest. I've been packed for well over two weeks already. Sadly, I mean COMPLETELY packed. Aiden, Ethan and I, ready to go. I keep adding odds and ends, but truthfully, I could have been out the door and on a plane half a month ago with really no worries.) What I mean is emotionally how can I be in a tailspin? It's not like this is unexpected. I knew at SOME point we'd be headed to China get our little boy. And to clarify, I am excited beyond words!! What I also am is nervous, a little scared, worried.....you get the idea. I worry about Aiden's reaction. I am sad for Ethan. I know in the long run he will be fine, but short-term he is going to be so scared, hurt, and even angry. I feel sorrow for his foster family who will have lost two long-term foster children in a short amount of time. I am TERRIFIED of a 15 hour flight with a very active 4-year-old and then another 15 hour flight with the same very active 4-year-old and a scared, out-of-sorts, sad, and, by the sounds of things, active 22 month old. I am nervous about how the dynamics of our family will change. How our very lives will be altered. Again, please do not misunderstand me. I am happy to the point of not being able to sleep at night. For real! I am excited -- giddy! The reality is, though, that I am also anxious. We could sure use prayers that the transition goes smoothly. I don't just mean Gottcha Day, I mean our family's bonding and melding together. We could also use prayers for a safe trip. Have I ever mentioned my shear terror of flying?! :'( Thank you everybody, who has gotten us to this point. We would not be here without your love and encouragement!
**Please excuse the disjointed nature of this post. There is a distinct possibility that my brain is somewhat on overload, and I have not been sleeping well the last few nights. That's my excuse anyway! ;) **