Wednesday, August 8, 2012

One Week

Can you even believe it?! One week. Seven days. In that amount of time, God willing, we will be sleeping right now in Hong Kong. It is 11:00 Wednesday night there. A week from now, we will have been in-country for about 5 hours, hopefully safely ensconsed in our hotel.

Everybody says this, and they say it because it's true: throughout this process you wait, wait, wait....and wait some more; then everything starts to move at warp speed. A week. How can we be that close? It's not like we haven't had time to prepare. Lord knows we have! Almost a year, actually. Then why do I feel so woefully UNprepared right now? I don't mean logistically or "physically." (Let's be honest. I've been packed for well over two weeks already. Sadly, I mean COMPLETELY packed. Aiden, Ethan and I, ready to go. I keep adding odds and ends, but truthfully, I could have been out the door and on a plane half a month ago with really no worries.) What I mean is emotionally how can I be in a tailspin? It's not like this is unexpected. I knew at SOME point we'd be headed to China get our little boy. And to clarify, I am excited beyond words!! What I also am is nervous, a little scared, get the idea. I worry about Aiden's reaction. I am sad for Ethan. I know in the long run he will be fine, but short-term he is going to be so scared, hurt, and even angry. I feel sorrow for his foster family who will have lost two long-term foster children in a short amount of time. I am TERRIFIED of a 15 hour flight with a very active 4-year-old and then another 15 hour flight with the same very active 4-year-old and a scared, out-of-sorts, sad, and, by the sounds of things, active 22 month old. I am nervous about how the dynamics of our family will change. How our very lives will be altered. Again, please do not misunderstand me. I am happy to the point of not being able to sleep at night. For real! I am excited -- giddy! The reality is, though, that I am also anxious. We could sure use prayers that the transition goes smoothly. I don't just mean Gottcha Day, I mean our family's bonding and melding together. We could also use prayers for a safe trip. Have I ever mentioned my shear terror of flying?! :'( Thank you everybody, who has gotten us to this point. We would not be here without your love and encouragement!

**Please excuse the disjointed nature of this post. There is a distinct possibility that my brain is somewhat on overload, and I have not been sleeping well the last few nights. That's my excuse anyway! ;) **

1 comment:

  1. Good luck!! I'm sure you're so ready to be on your way! Good luck on the flights--I *hate* to fly, too, so hear ya on that one. :-)